Thursday, April 19, 2012

The Dance

"a time to mourn...
and a time to dance." Eccl 3:4 

In an effort to escape the beautiful chaos of my everyday life for just a minute to myself, I walk a path around our farm most every evening...stopping for a moment to find His reflection somewhere within the rippling waters of my own on the surface of our pond in the woods...breathing in every Word I can glean from Him in the serenity.  One particular night, I began my evening walk just as the sun began to reach the tops of the trees along the horizon of my country life. The stage was set as the wheat planted in the field right now is so green and refreshing. It glows in the fires of the setting sun, gently swaying harmoniously in the breeze.  Please don't think I'm crazy, but as I began my walk with my Creator, I couldn't help but find myself laying in the midst of His creation...literally.  As I was in deep conversation with the Father, I just had to stop and lay down right in the glory of His wheat fields, amidst the other fruit He is ripening for harvest. I share a kindred season with them.  We find ourselves preparing...waiting...growing into the destiny that He has laid before us. It was an amazing moment in His presence, as He drew me closer to Himself. All I could see was the wheat surrounding me, the clouds above me, and an occasional bird soaring in the freedom of His endless blue sky. I was in awe...and envious. 

It has been several months now that I have been trapped in a cage of depression, wanting only to soar on the wings of hope...the promise He has given us...HOPE for the Future.  I somehow have felt like I have been barely breathing, just watching as my life went by me, without me belonging to it...desperately wondering what His plan would behold. It has been a difficult walk as I have poured out my heart with rivers of tears everyday to a Father who I know holds me, but also molds me by saying only...wait, hope, trust. I begged to hear Him as loudly as I felt Him closely there with me in that field.   

I could have laid there forever hidden in that moment with Him.  But, the beautiful chaos of my everyday life called me up to continue my walk back home. I slowly started one foot after the other and caught myself looking down, watching the rhythm of my feet. I drifted back to the echo of my beloved dance teacher telling me gently, "Don't look at your feet...look up."  God spoke to me with majesty...

"You look at your feet in fear and uncertainty of where you will take your next step. Look up my child, let the rest of you become part of the dance."

The next morning I received a poetic affirmation in a devotion defining grace..."an effortless dancer and God's unmerited favor."  

You see, as a tiny ballerina, I stared down at my feet, afraid to take the wrong step, insecure in my imperfection as a dancer. But, experience and confidence grew me into grace and I began to be able to lift my eyes allowing the rest of me to become part of the dance...  I soon became the effortless dancer.  

In complete awe of God's words to my heart, I heard His patient melody as it became the music that filled my soul. 

"Be so confident in the promise of My grace, that you can lift your eyes and your uncertainty and be free to be a part of the dance. Let the hand of My grace guide the feet of yours and you will move instinctively in harmony with My will...not worried about what My next step for you will be but trusting Me to lead you to become the effortless dancer that I created you to be."

My prayer is simply for Guidance and to dance in the rain...

God, U and I, DANCE  

"Life isn't about waiting for the storms to pass, but learning to dance in the rain..."

"HOPE is the ability to hear the music of tomorrow...Faith is the courage to dance to it today."     

You have turned my mourning into dancing; removed my cloth of sadness and girded me with gladness...
Psalm 30:11   

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